What INFJs Want In A Relationship
And why they want it
First and foremost, INFJs want a relationship where there is positive growth and attention towards getting to know one another.
In the sense that someone is a forever-learner with them, and a forever-adventurer, be it mentally, physically or spiritually even.
Sparking new ideas & experiences in our lives and simply enjoying the experience that life is and always will be.
Someone who does not need us, and we don’t need them either, but we both want each other on a voluntary basis. A healthy relationship is for both partners to have their seperate lives, but still come together and not be in need of each other, but instead out of will and awareness want and like each other.
Someone who doesn’t only love us, but likes us too: a best friend we can share our most genuine idiosyncratic weirdness and flaws with, and someone who can delight in that, because they know that humans are inherently flawed, but that makes them essentially humans and that is beautiful.
Someone who doesn’t also take a relationship lightly, but is fully commited and whom we can give our trust, and who trusts us; and in the idea of an “us” — a team.
Someone who doesn’t idealize a relationship, but takes us as who we really are: flawed, quirky and weird. And we do the same; and off the journey we go.
Furthermore, INFJs want to be with someone who challenges them in a witty, crafty, adroit sense, as in teaching them new stuff. Someone to bring novelty in our life, who is enthusiastic about something; be it art, writing, making music, singing, crafting, sculpturing, calligraphy, swimming, kayaking, yoga, tai chi, fishing, archery, cooking, oil painting, or really anything they want to explore and pursue, like an action that tires you but puts your heart at ease; a cleansing experience.
Someone who’s passionate about continual improvement. And someone who values virtue; a style of life to be still, listen and understand.
Someone who is true to themselves and non-deceptive, relatively open-minded to see a bigger picture and willing to see things from other people’s perspectives.
In a nutshell:
Someone who’s honest, values themself & is true to themself, has an open mind, can be independent: i.e., who can be alone, enjoy pursuing a hobby or interest, not need to talk with us while being in the same room with us so as to give us our time to recharge & reflect on our thoughts and emotions.
And finally, I‘d say INFJs just want to share their life with someone that adores, values and also sees & hears them — that is, who pays enough attention to understand them — and can have a healthy conflict with them that leads to a better understanding of both partners; who tries to “get things back on track.”
Someone who’s loyal & sensitive to their own and our needs.
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Originally posted on Quora
